Friday, August 27, 2004

SEXYLES HAS BEEN SHUT DOWN

After just 24 hours our ad's have been shut down. Possibly because both ad's had the same email address. Anyway we have all the information and freaks we needed.

Later I will post both ad's on DAS SPUNKEN for those that didn't have a chance to view them whilst they were on Swingers Heaven.

Who says romance is dead?

victorgp@tiscali.co.uk -email him and tell him he is a dirty dawg
Hello Lesley, if I bring my dog along, would you let him lick you while I watch?

What a sick puppy hey kids!

Anyway the scores on the whores currently stand at

SEXYLES MALE 02 -I FEAR THIS MAY BE THE FINAL TALLY
SEXY LES FEMALE 146

I th9ink the links below are no longer active therefore to find the ad's please look for the following:

SEXYLES MALE -go into the section marked men looking for women and look for the title "I can fulfil your dreams"

SEXYLES FEMALE - go into the section marked women looking for men and look for the title "Would you like me to lapdance for you?"

More updates, pics and postings soon.

Thursday, August 26, 2004

THE MOST DEPRAVED MAN AND WOMAN IN THE UK


worktoilets_t
Originally uploaded by das spunken.

WOW THE RESPONSES ARE CUMING(sic) THICH AND FAST. THE AD'S WERE POSTED JUST OVER 1HR AGO AND THE SCORES STAND AT:

MALE SEXY LES AD: 02 FEMALE LES AD: 38

IN HINDSIGHT I THINK PUTTING SEXY LES MALE AD MAY BE PUTTING OFF MANY OF THE UK'S FEMALE POPULATION. SO THE 2 THAT HAS REPLIED MUST BE SEVERELY DEPRAVED.

STAY TUNED AND I WILL GIVE YOU A ROUND UP AT THE END OF THE WEEK.

Oh Yes I forgot to say that we will post ALL decent entries onto our lil olde site. Also we will obviously when all entries have been received, inform all respondees that they will be live and direct on everyones favourite blog site DAS SPUNKEN.

THE MOST DEPRAVED MAN AND WOMAN IN THE UK

Click on the link above to view the ladies advert. Time to kick back and wait for some replies to find out if we can find the most deprived couple in the UK.

Stay online at Das Spunken for regular updates.

HERE AT LAST THE SEARCH FOR THE MOST DEPRAVED MAN AND WOMAN IN THE UK

About time as well, here we go, follow the link above and see Les the computer geek charming the ladies. The ladies ad will be posted soon.

STAY TUNED TO FIND OUT IF SEXY LES GETS ANY EMAILS, DEPRAVED WOMEN OF THE UK WE ARE LOOKING FOR YOU

Tuesday, August 24, 2004

DAS SPUNKEN -THE GREAT MEAT DEBATE


das_0000_Layer 3
Originally uploaded by das spunken.
DONT VOTE WITH YOUR FEET -VOTE FOR THE MEAT!

WHY I HATE BLOGS


kevin
Originally uploaded by das spunken.
I really hate blogs, they are dire. They seem to fall into several catergories:

1. US of A Zealots
2. Relegious Types
3. Deathly boring blogs from the far east or Asia
4. Angst ridden teen blogs usually spouting cack about the lastest band called "Anal Clamp" or something like that.
5. Family blogs "Dad enjoys listening to wings and here is a picture of me next to niagra falls etc"
6. Very amateur poets and short story writers.

To illustrate my point I have selected several examples:

Look at this exceedingly piss poor excuse for prose on http://punrisepunset.blogspot.com/

COFFEE
My bank charges a hugh coffee
Coffee anan is a handsome black man
Have you tried this salt water coffee? its addictive
Did he coffee you the job?
Coffee up the cash!
I have a hacking coffee
Did you buy the coffeen for your dead son yet?
I hate it when someone in an audience is coffeeing
I think Robert De Niro is really in the coffee-a
Get coffee your ass and do some work already!
I coffeel ya!
(Hiking accident--avalanche) AHHHH! I coffeel my legs!


What utter toss.

This one definately falls into category 1 and 2.

http://jeffberryman.blogspot.com/

In recent months, prayer became difficult. Not because I didn't want to pray, but because whenever I did so, a feeling of futility would sweep in.

Thats called relegion Jeff, futile and fruitless.

Finally http://corrosiveboy2crybaby.blogspot.com/ is one of the finest examples of the downward spiralling of modern civilisation I have ever witnessed. I mean what do they teach in schools these days that make kids write like this. Since when has the mobile phone taken over from the english language and what is she/he talking about? Mark my words, with people like this we are heading into the dark ages again!

juz found out how weak i m todae....i cried again....3rd time striaght row in a week....i m weak rite???i wan pple's attention....so i cry loh...nvm...since i m so fricking weak..it's ok.....i feel corrosive....from head to toe....my face looks lyk my ass...i mean i m damn ugly...my attititude sux....although some pple say every1 hates me....i dun seem to believe....wad can i do??i m a gay shit and i yl kguys so i cant stop thinking about them....hell yeah...
danny's ball became black and i think it is becoz of me.....i tried to act violent....erh...but i think i lost the battle....then i cry and cry lyk a baby....spilling corrosive shit out of my eyes....although i dunno tt the whole class hates me.....i dun care....coz i still got BITCH UGLY ELEPHANT PEARLY and SLUT LESBIAN SIHUI....both bitches r wad i get attention from...although they r damn ugly....haix...cant blame me...i m gay and i got bad taste....cya in class coz i m a faggot and should not belong to this school....CAT HI is 4 guys but i m gay??which school do u all think i should go??I M WEAK AND I M GAY...that's all i haf to sae 4 todae.

No me neither. Anyway I thought it was fair for the DAS SPUNKEN think tank to leave them some friendly advise so I posted "Hi I just wanted to say how poor your blog is. I have featured it on my site http://dasspunken.blogspot.com/. Feel free to comment and to also vote on your favourite meat". on their sites

KEN A SPUNDS APPLICATION LETTER TO BECOME A SMACK CONVERTERS FRANCHISEE

Time to send Ken A Spunds application to Smack Converters via uksupportcentre@cashconverters.net

Smack converters say that

Our existing franchisees come from a diverse range of backgrounds, their individual endeavours together with the proven support systems, experience and encouragement offered by Cash Converters has resulted in the establishment of many hundreds of successful franchises throughout the world.

Lets see what they make of Ken's application:


Dear Cash Converter,

Application for Cash Converters Franchisee

My name is Mr Kenneth A Spunds, I am enquiring about the excellent opportunity to become a franchisee of one of your stores.

I have lived in London for 17 years, I originally moved to London to join the merchant navy. I ended up running a very successful grocery business before ill health forced me to retire early.

Now at the age of 68, I feel I have a good head for figures and I like to keep active by doing word search puzzles. I have completed over 4000 to date and have even designed several searches that have been published by the Readers Digest magazine.

I think that I would be an asset to Cash Converters, because I would give people only the smallest amount for their goods. I recently went into one of your stores and watched a young single mother pawning her ring for money. The sales assistant was very kind and gave her ?10.00. I think in business there is no room for sentimental claptrap and I would have only given her ?3.00.

If I were successful I would keep gypsies out of the shop and also ban east
Europeans because they are always starting wars. I would also offer complimentary cups of soups on cold days. I do vote conservative and Margaret Thatcher was always my hero. Maybe it was because we both were greengrocers and our partners were both called Denis.

I am handicapped and have a fully functioning mobility vehicle, so attracting fellow disablists is a primary concern. Maybe I could go around your other stores and give the managers lessons on how to get the handicapper?s money. I do hope my immobile legs this wont affect my application.

Finally my hobbies are cleaning my house, watching TV especially Last of the Summer Wine (of which I am the leader of the Last of the Summer wine London branch appreciation society) and tending my pigeon ?Hawkins? who is 7 years (76 in human years).

I look forward to hearing from you in due course.

Yours sincerely


Kenneth A Spunds Eqs.

Monday, August 23, 2004

Smack Converters Franchise


cash converters
Originally uploaded by das spunken.
COMING SOON

It's time to wheel out Ken Spunds and his mobility vehicle and apply for a Smack Converters franchise.

OPEN INVITATION TO MR "you're a fucking stup1d jerk!"


hillbilly
Originally uploaded by das spunken.
Look what happened when Das Spunken decided to post a few ad's on our American cousins blogs. Most of the blogs were comically right wing and christian in their content.

We would love Mr "you're a fucking stup1d jerk!" to come back and have a excellent debate on the benefits of his blog against the far superior DAS SPUNKEN.

Anyway I didn't know that americans in trailer parks could get internet access. Bang goes all youre money for appearing on Jerry Springer, you've not even saved any cash to buy your mommy/lover any new underwear.

You said our content was weird, but living in trailer home/caravan and making love to immediate family members (cousins ok) doesn't strike you as deviating from the norm?

Please come back to our site, we love your intelligent and literate comments.

Finally MR "you're a fucking stup1d jerk!" remember that Bobs your uncle, but he is also you're father!

Anonymous said...
You are a fucking asshole-stop trying to generate traffic to your blog with stupid comments on other people's blogs...No one cares about this wierdo shit anyway except for your cronies who are as disillusioned as you are...you're a fucking stup1d jerk!


MR "you're a fucking stup1d jerk!" promoting trailerpark love in every incest filled southern state near you. I'm gonna ride you like a hog boy...........................................................................

Friday, August 20, 2004

"Your site is offfensive and incorrect to say otherwises"

Well done to the anonymous person that left the message below:

Anonymous said...
Phil Collins is an anti-semetic, it's a well known fact amongst my friends in the jewish community. So keep your mouth shut on issues that concern you. Your site is offfensive and incorrect to say otherwises.



Finally I am sorry and I will keep my mouth shut on matters that concern me and I will try to be less offffffffffffffffffffffffffffensive in the future to say otherwises.

Wednesday, August 18, 2004

7 WAYS TO BEAT THE BOSS


JSKABF06
Originally uploaded by das spunken.

For most people public enemy number 1 is not Mr Bin Laden, Saddam Hussein or even John Leslie. It's the boss!

These 7 nuggets of urban wisdom will help you, the opressed employee battle back in war for office domination.


SHOPLIFTING BOSS
Slip some anti-shoplifting strips into the lining of your bosses favourite jacket. Watch him/her wander into HMV at lunch and then lay low for the rest of the afternoon.

AIRPORT GUN SCAM
It's the day of their big international business meeting and they're off to Heathrow airport very soon. Now preparation is key in this scam. Cut out a gun shape from metal at home, then bring it into the office, at an opportune moment slip it into their hand luggage and wait for the madness to commence.

THE SWOIREE STING
Your boss is having an informal gathering at his/her house with business contacts and a few choice friends. Help him/her out by inviting a few extra guests; prepare your own flyer, which could include the following example
You might put up flyers around biker bars advertising, "All the beer you can drink" and "Tara the biker babe strips" Let the Blue Nun flow!!

DIRTY BOSS
Enter subscriptions in your bosses name to the most filthy donkey love/bondage/snuff magazines you can find, and change his address by one number so his neighbour receives them. His neighbours will not only be disgusted by his perversions, they will also be irritated by the fact that he is too stupid to get his address right on the subscription. May cost a few quid but very worthwhile.

TEABAG TERRORISM
Everyone loves a nice cup of tea, especially the boss. Volunteer to make a cup of tea for your boss. All you need to do is firstly work up a sweat by jogging on the spot. Once an adequate sweat has been accumulated you need to then take the teabag wiping the sweat off your brow, armpits and the inner caverns of your groin and watch your boss drink the deathly sweat cocktail. It's even better when they exclaim in a loud office to fellow workers ц╒б─б°thatц╒б─б≥s one of the best cups of tea Ive had in ages.


Your colleagues at Das Spunken put this one into practice several years ago and gained some excellent results.

THE GAY BUILDER
Get your bosses mobile phone number and turn it into a professional male prostitutes calling card. Have fun creating your own text like "Gay Builder requires heavy construction"I have a friend called Das Stefan who can help you out with this if you need. (You can leave a comment for him underneath this post and I will pass on your details) Place them all around your local red light district and watch your boss turn grey overnight. (Grey not Gay)

Tends not to work so well if your boss is either female or a committed homosexual. (Committed in the non mad way)

BATTLING AGAINST THE BROWN NOSER (very elaborate but wholly worthwhile)
Every office has a brown noser, butt kisser, a subservient Gareth from the office type character. The type that only know how to say YES. Who is
intent on climbing the corporate ladder at the expense of their colleagues. Well it's revenge time!

Wait until your boss goes to the toilet. (Brown time is best). Once in the cubicle, go into the toilet ruffling papers and pretend to accidentally drop a paper under the door. At this point you adapt the persona of the brown noser.
Wash your hands and leave pretending not to realise your paper has gone missing. It will be an email, example below:

To: (Any made up name)
From: Brown nosers name

Date: Today or recent date
Title: My boss (or something similar)

(Body of the text should read something like)

Hi (friends name)

Yeah I am still having those thoughts about my boss. It's not that I am in love with him/her. I just have very very strong feelings for him/her. It might be a power thing but I just love the way him/her dishes out commands to other people in the office. I feel safe working next to such a strong character, I even have a list of my bosses favourite clothes, I love the (add your own bosses clothes here).

I often have daydreams about how me and (bosses name) are running the country and when he/she shouts at me and it sends a shiver of exciting down my spine.

(I will leave the rest to you)

Regards Brown Noser


Anyway brown nosing will be a thing of the past when your boss claps eyes on this worrying little email.

Have you seen the light that Das Spunken offers.

COMING VERY SOON: THE MOST DEPRAVED MAN AND WOMAN IN THE UK


worktoilets_t
Originally uploaded by das spunken.
Stay tuned to see what happened when Das Spunken posted fake ad's to the UK's leading swingers website.

Thats right folks we are looking for the most depraved man and woman in the UK.

Tuesday, August 17, 2004

Das Spunken sites of the week


shrews7
Originally uploaded by das spunken.

Every week on the Das Spunken wewill bring the you finest selection of websites that make your eyes bleed:

www.theonion.com -Read George Bushes blog

www.youknowsit.co.uk -Welsh hip hop at it's finest, from the GLC-apparently you fuckin knows it.

www.b3ta.co.uk -Rob Manual, genius behind female or shemale

www.b3ta.com - Photoshop madness, which we Das Spunken occasionally steals

www.sausagelinks.co.uk - Everything you want to know about meat but were too afraid to ask your local butcher.

www.mrandmrswheatley.co.uk - Excellent site with all sorts of shit. Probably the best site on the internet ever

www.moripula.com -Quality website, quality design-thanks for the wicked logos -the ham shall always remain grey.

SMACK CONVERTERS TELEPHONE CONVERSATION

Ahhh Tuesday morning lets make a call to Smack Converters to see if they really can change my Phillip Collins CD's into hard cash: Here's what happened:


Good morning is that Cash Converters
Yes Sir how can I Help

I have some musical compact discs which I would like to turn into money can you help me?
Yes of course, what are the CDБ─≥s?

Phillip Collins mainly, I just wanted to know how it works
Yeah, we cant really offer that much on older CDБ─≥s. Do you live close by?

Yes I do.
If you would like to come in we are open from 9 til 5 weekdays.

O.K but first I just wanted to know how you are able to turn CDБ─≥s into money?
Sorry, (bored expression) If you come into the shop we can look at the CDБ─≥s and give you a price.

But you can make money out of a CD?
No we, will give you a price for the CD and then we give you the value in money?

Struggling to keep his attention You do loans
His ears prick up Yes sir we can give you a quotation. The best thing is if you can come into the shop.

I would like to but I am disabled (stroke of genius) and my mobility vehicle is currently broken. ThatБ─≥s why I need the loan and why I am having to sell my Phillip Collins compact discs.

Ok Sir I understand now. We can give you quote now, I will need to take some details from you. Do you own your own home?

Yes

O.k Good and whatБ─≥s your name and address
Ken Spunds, I need some money and IБ─≥m on 15 Chupa Chups a day you know!

15 Chupa Chupas? I am sorry I think this is going anywhere

I interject Can you turn Garden furniture into money? I have soon garden furniture.

Bye
Can I have a loan for my mobility vehicleБ─╕Б─╕Б─╕

DAS SPUNKEN -A WAY OF LIFE


das_0001_Layer 1
Originally uploaded by das spunken.
Wow-this is one of 2 great new logo's. Thanks to the excellent Grey-Ham on the Moripula website -Live and direct in South Africa. See this week's Das Spunken sites of the week for more details.

Monday, August 16, 2004

ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE


Germanyposter200
Originally uploaded by das spunken.

Collins hitchhiking in Germany, with a suitcase full to the brim of ladies underwear and human body parts.

Well folks, I post with a heavy heart and a wet chin. Does this mean little Phil is giving up music and retiring gracefully. (Take note Elton, Madonna, Rolling Stones and Gary Barlow)

Who can forget those heady days in the 80s when cockney Collins charmed us with songs like "Two Hearts living in just one mind, staying together til the end of time" Phil's lament to siamese twins. Although strictly their hearts will not beat until the end of time. They usually die at about 45ish.

Who can forget "Coming in the air tonight" Phils diatribe to outdoor sex.

It still brings a tear to my eye as Pip sings about "Another day in Paradise". Homelessness is something Phil feels strongly about. The song penned while sitting in his luxury 5million Florida home was a hit in 53 countries worldwide.

Read the latest letter on Phils website which Poppa Collins answered himself, Das Spunken comments in Red:

Letter from USA

Dear Mr Collins,

I hope this letter finds you well. I love your music and your lyrics; you are truly a musical genius. I grew up on your music.(Why didn't he stop reading after this line) I heard some very disturbing news that I find very hard to believe, it is said that you are an anti-Semite and you wholeheartedly support the P.L.O., Palestinians, who are mass murderers and were responsible for 9/11.(PLO responsible for 9/11, are you mad?) They kill their own; they blow themselves up and have their women and children blowing up innocent people and themselves. How could an artist with such G-d(Scared to say G-d) given talents, who writes and sings about love, pain, forgiveness, kindness, brotherhood,(outdoor sex, siamese twins) etc., support this organization and dislike Jewish people, it just does not make sense. I am sure you do not know this but many Jews will not buy your music or listen to your music. My children ask me to change the radio station when your music comes on or your name is mentioned.(This is probably not due to relegious or political reasons) I just cannot believe this, it hurts me so, I guess I am writing to you to clear this up. You are entitled to your beliefs and support who you wish, it just does not fit your profile.(Cuddly cockney adults favourite) I heard you answer your fans that take the time to write to you, even if it is only a few lines. I wait your reply, I would hate to have to stop listening to your music, it gives me such pleasure. I hope this information is incorrect, and I hope I can correct people and tell them this is false.

Sincerely,

A. Twat



Phil's reply

December 17, 2003


Dear Fat backward paranoid American


I have only just received your letter and to say that I'm confused, angry and baffled is an understatement!(Phil means, jesus not another american)

I have no idea how these rumours start but there is absolutely no truth in what you've heard at all. I have never been asked what I feel about the problems that exist so have never voiced any opinion. The fact that Jewish people refuse to listen to my music because of this is very sad. (Thanks for supplying only reason to convert to Judaism)Altogether, a bleak picture really. My beliefs cover only what I believe to be right or wrong, I have no blanket belief that could be interpreted in a way that you express in your letter.

A rumour similar to this, and possibly the origin of this one, I heard in NY in the 80's. Someone said that they'd read in a Jewish magazine that I was an anti-Semite and I could not work out how that one started. However, the same person then went on to tell a similar story to yours wouldn't mention my name, play the music, etc (Sorry Phil it just spiralled out of control, it was meant to be a joke with a drunken journalist at a News Kids on the Block after party)

I was then married to a lady whose father was Jewish so the story was even more farcical.

Anyway, we know there are some very strange, disturbed people out there(Das Spunken) and this must be how this has come about.(Honestly Phil we didn't mean it) On a personal note, I urge you to tell your friends, show them this letter if they don't believe you make them see that this has no truth to it. I have always prided myself on a complete lack of racial and religious prejudice so your letter gets to me more than some other criticisms might.

As for your children, tell 'em 'Uncle' Phil's (Uncle Phil, - Mommy does Uncle Phil have to come and babysit tonight) not so bad as they thought.

Yours sincerely,

Phil Collins

CONVERSATION WITH SMACK CONVERTERS


cash converters
Originally uploaded by das spunken.
Smack converters are the parasites which turn junkies swag into very small amounts of hard cash. These places have more protection surrounding them than your average high street bank.

The mind melders at Das Spunken wanted to find out if they literally could turn my old Phil Collins Gretest Hits CD into hard cash. Keep tuned in to find out.

DAISSEY-INTERVIEW WITH A PORN STAR


4713
Originally uploaded by das spunken.
Loves Das Spunken. See the full interview below!!

DAS SPUNKEN COUNCILLOR OF THE WEEK


Ncolledg
Originally uploaded by das spunken.
Councillor Neil Colledge
Party: Conservative
Ward: Whitestone, Nuneaton

This weeks nomination is a man mountain in local politics. Mr Colledge has been accredited for putting the "Les Dawson" back into local politics.

Neil is living proof that the gravy train still exists in the local political spheres of influence.

Lead member in appeals meetings. If you want to build a slaughter house or concentration camp next to your local primary school take Neil out for some quality gnosh and watch your planning application sail through the relevant departments.

Neil may your days of full stomached council catering continue.

Thursday, August 12, 2004

INTERVIEW WITH A PORN STAR (click me and i will take you to Daissey)

Thursday evening nothing to do lets interview Daissey, minor porn star and regular web cam girl at the above link:

Hi Daisy, How are you today?
Fine Das, how are you?

Great, Im from an online blog called Das Spunken and I wondered if I could talk to you for a few minutes?
Are you from German? )

No iam not German, I am from UK, I do know a guy from Germany called Sebastian though, do you know him?
No, I am very hot though, no!

How long have you been doing this?
Take me into pvt and I will do anything.

Anything? Would you let me lapdance for you? you can push money at the screen as I press my pants against the monitor.
No response

Hi are you still here?
I am so horny take me into pvt, I do anal toys

My mum doesn't let me play with anal toys, but i do like computer games.
You are a children!! Get off this site.

No I was joking, I am not a "children", dont kick me off

At this point I was kindly removed from the site.







COMING SOONISH INTERVIEW WITH A PORN STAR

COMING SOONISH INTERVIEW WITH A PORN STAR
Martin Bashar and Michael Jackson, Trevor McDonald and Princess Diana.

Das Spunken brings you an interview with a minor european porn star. Keep your ears online to find out more.

Say no to Bulimia, Peter Pan psychosis and child abuse and yes to a gritty insiders view on the world of euro porn.

ACTION AND ACTION


textures1
Originally uploaded by das spunken.
Check out these hot tortilla bitches. They sound like a sicillian mafia bosses brain hitting a wall.

Formed in early 2004 from the ashes of 3 other bands, Action and Action has spent the last few months writing material and establishing its own sound.

NEXT GIG: Saturday 14th August, The Bull & Gate, Kentish Town, London

COMING VERY SOON THE DAS SPUNKEN SEARCH FOR THE MOST DEPRAVED PERSON IN THE UK


f877
Originally uploaded by das spunken.
COMING VERY SOON: Very soon we will show you all the fake ad's posted to the leading UK Swingers website. The wise nuts at Das Spunken deceided to do one male and one female. Therefore giving us the most deprived couple in the UK. Keep on eye on Das Spunken for further updates.

DAS SPUKENS FIRST EVER COMMENT

Sebastien Schieffer we salute you for being the very first person to ever comment on this site. You win the Das Spunken prize for effiency and interpretation. We would be very interested in hearing your further views on several topics namely:

1. Why did David Hasselhoff have a long lasting highly successful music career during the 1990's.
2. Why did the Scorpions -Wind of change prove to be the most successful number 1 record in German history.
3. The German porn industry, has it hit it's peak or is there more to cum. (sorry couldn't resist that)

Anyway thanks Sebastien and if you are still out there, please contribute again! Here is Sebs informative post in full.


Hello Mr Spunken

I ama german studing English in UK your site is cool and I think many germans will like all of the funny items you talk about.

Das- that Spunken- Spunk is real german meaning of your site.

sebastien schieffer


Wednesday, August 11, 2004

The meaning of Das Spunken


img6
Originally uploaded by das spunken.
The word uttered directly after "plenty" on a European Skin Flick, immediately after the lead male has deposited his load onto the waiting female.

Ooh, aaah, jah, das is gut, ohh, ooh ooh ohh ohhhh MMMEEEEUURRRRR!! Planty spunken!!

Meaning great! Exciting!

Its great!!!!! Its SPUNKEN!!!

Urbandictionary.com

Tuesday, August 10, 2004

COMING SOON THE DAS SPUNKEN SEARCH FOR THE MOST DEPRAVED PERSON IN THE UK


nun
Originally uploaded by das spunken.
COMING SOON: See what happened when Das Spunken posted a fake ad to one of the UK's leading swinging websites to try to find the most depraved person in the UK.

DAS SPUNKEN COUNCILLOR OF THE WEEK



Originally uploaded by das spunken.
Councillor Eileen Kinnear
Party: ermmmm guess????
Yep thats right folks Eileen is your local friendly Conservative coucillor.
Ward: Harrow on the Hill

Eileen has given the people of Harrow over 14 years of service. Looking like a strange cross between Buddy Holly and Dame Edna, it's been said that Eileen can see the french port of Calais on a clear day.

Eileen Kinnear we salute you and wish you many happy years of counciling

Das Spunken sites of the week


shrews7
Originally uploaded by das spunken.

Every week on the Das Spunken wewill bring the you finest selection of websites that make your eyes bleed:

www.meatshake.com - Meat

www.preparingforemergencies.co.uk -Spoof govenment site getting Tone, Blind Dave and Jackie S in a mood.

www.local6.com/news/3510166/detail.html - Inspired by tales of piracy, some creative sailors have replaced a gulls amputated leg with a plastic dolls arm.
Disturbingly, there's a chubby hand on the end of it. This little story proves that limb loss can be both amusing and wholesome. Lovely stuff.

www2.harrow.gov.uk - Introducing Councillor Eileen Kinnear, a lady with spectacles that the NHS wouldn't dare give away. Local councillors can be a constant source of amusement, so if any one else has any links please do send to DAS SPUNKEN.

www.phallic.org/mormon-masturbation.txt How Mormon try to avoid masturbation, if Mormoms tried to avoid masturbation, there would be more kids (get-it) Shit I know.

www.realdolldoctor.com/miscindex.htm - This man enjoys mending other peoples sex dolls. Apparently his work is a bit of a let down. (get-it, Im on fire now)


www.anothersite.co.uk - Quality site full of everything.

Introducing Mr Das Spunken

Hello I am Mr Das Spunken your host on the Das Spunken blog page. We at Das Spunken like to think of the page as more of a way of life. Over the coming years and months we would like to introdue to you the Das Spunken way of life giving you handy guidance on how to live your life the Das Spunken way.

Many people as me "Is Das Spunken a way of life, to achieve everlasting happiness?" I say "It can be, if you give me all your money and regular access to your girlfriend." Others say "Das Spunken, is it a cult" At least I think thats what they say, but they always seem to spell cult with an N instead of a L.

Here we go then lets enter the world of DAS SPUNKEN
Welcome to the world of Das Spunken